No motivational message. No challenge. I just felt like writing and this is what came out...
What is love? Is it when you see yourself in another person's soul? When you are certain that they love you as much as you love them? When you've finally molded a person to love you the way you want to be loved? If so, i disagree with you. Now.
I don't think love can be defined. Or compared. Yes, i've been in love before. Well, i've loved someone before. I would have loved them as much as they needed for as long as they wanted- As long as in my eyes, i was loved back to the same degree. Yep, I said it. I'm not giving this love away if I'm not sure if they love me the same. Immature? Maybe.
But love doesn't work like that. We don't always get want we want when we want it. No matter how bad that is. But if you love, you love. I've loved someone and tried to over-love them just so they'd return the favor. Yes, i wanted them to fall in love with how in love I was with them. A strategic plan of mine. And one of most women today.
We as women are taught to adore and admire a man in order to gain his true love. How sick is that? Almost like we gotta convince a nigga to love us. It's because we have so much competition in this society. Of course, I (like every woman) feel like I'm the shit and no chick can compare to what I offer in mind, body and soul. But since that's not how you guys base your judgment on who will be your next arm piece, that means we're all in the same league. Thus, we're all competing against each other for these niggas!!!
It's so funny because we thought we loved so many people. And in fact, it wasn't love at all. When I think about the times and the people I've wasted such a powerful word on, it makes me feel like that wasn't shit! It also makes me feel like it couldn't possibly be love because how the hell did I love someone who obviously (in my face) didn't love me back? Or how did I say it before I saw ALL of that person's true colors? What the fuck was in my head where this person didn't have to work for my love?! I just gave it willingly. I just don't know.
But now at 23, I'm as stubborn as I wanna be. I'm a sucker for love but I work on my offer package EVERYDAY! So you think I'm not gonna challenge you on what your package has to offer? I think not. I'm one of those people who refuses to give credit until I'm impressed. I won't hate but I won't compliment either LOL
Impress me! Love me like I've never experienced. Love me as hard as you can and even when I don't want you to. Love me when I don't love myself and I need it the most. Love me enough to challenge me to be all that I can be. Love me so much that nothing else matters in the world because I'm good- You love me so I'm whole. Not worried about shit else. Love me in a way that I feel sick when I don't have you in my grasp. I want that type of love where we're in the same room and I can't wait to dip and take your clothes off. When I just HAVE to touch you. I want it where we are silly like kids when together. Where the sex is crazy every single time. Even during a quickie! When our friends know the deal and we're one. Never just Vic. But more like, "Is (enter name here) and Vic coming too?"
Yea... I want that shit.
-Vic
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Monday, June 14, 2010
Cleanse, Pray, and Don't Skit
June 14, 2010
5:35 a.m.
I did something really interesting a couple of minutes ago...
I did something that I haven't done in a couple of years...
I did something that I've been avoiding...
I did something that was completely necessary to improve my mental and even physical well-being...
I did something that I encourage everyone to try...
A couple of minutes ago, I got on my knees and prayed.
For the past few months, PAUSE... For the past few years, I have felt somewhat lost. I can't quite put my finger on it, but it's a feeling that has been eating away at me. It's definitely not "Girl Interrupted" lost or "Lindsay Lohan" lost. I've been just kind of floating around and going with the wind. While I always embrace a good "going with the wind" moment, I think that living ones life that way for a long period of time can be utterly draining.
After months of reflection, alone time, tears, good times, and clearly bad times, I have made a decision to take control of my life. Now! There are a few ways that I intend on doing this. I've realized the beauty of having a blog and being able to share this with y'all is that if you see me out in the streets, you are totally welcome to call me out if you catch me slipping on my goals (which I REALLY encourage BTW Lol). So like I was saying, I have really thought out how I am going to begin this little journey of mine. Here we go!
1. PRAY! Everyday... To myself... out loud... on my iPhone Notes... whatever works at the moment.
2. Start with the Master Cleanse. Naysayers, please keep comments to yourself... Lol... No seriously... No negativity needed here.
For those that do not know, the Master Cleanse, "also known as the Lemon Cleanse and the Maple Syrup Diet, is a body and mind detoxification program created by alternative medicine performer Stanley Burroughs in 1941." Don't you just LOVE Wikipedia! Some people chose to do the Cleanse for 7 or 10 days. I've chosen to go full out and do 10 days.
3. Along with the Cleanse, I'm giving drinking a little rest. I know! I know! No fun huh? Well, I'm actually not even allowed to drink while doing the Cleanse, but I figured it would be a great way to focus and gain some perspective. Don't worry DC Summer friends... I promise to have a little fun with you before the summer is over :)
4. Cloves... Also taking a hike with the Cleanse and it will be a great path to me quitting at the end of summer. I know some people are gunna be ecstatic about #4. Lol
5. Get back active! I think back to when I was happiest and sharpest and it was definitely anytime I was competing in some type of sports activity. I miss that... I miss competition... I miss being outdoors and going for a run or swim. It's been a minute so I may just start with taking Ollie on some journeys or borrowing someones bike until I get this money up and get my own. SMH...
6. Reflect. Read. Write.
7. Get a weave... Hahaha... I'm just playing... but on the low... If this DC heat keeps it up, I might actually keep #7
So there's my list. That is my own personal path to gaining some peace and taking back control of my life. When I prayed, I asked God for strength and dude! I am going to need A LOT of it to really follow through. I will honestly say that I tend to make goals and just say eff it and move onto the next. This is NOT the person that I want to be. This is also something very difficult to admit, but it's necessary if I'm going to get to where I need to in life.
Like I said, I'm going to need some strength. I'm going to need support. If you can, pray for a player... Offer some words of encouragement... @Reply me on Twitter and help me stay motivated.... and if there's something that you are skitting on, consider stopping and setting a dope lil' goal for yourself. I know... It's hard, but trust me when I say... I am the ultimate skitter and I'm pretty damn good at it, but skitting is whack as long as you're skitting yourself.
I did something really interesting a couple of minutes ago...
I did something that I haven't done in a couple of years...
I did something that I've been avoiding...
I did something that was completely necessary to improve my mental and even physical well-being...
I did something that I encourage everyone to try...
A couple of minutes ago, I got on my knees and prayed.
For the past few months, PAUSE... For the past few years, I have felt somewhat lost. I can't quite put my finger on it, but it's a feeling that has been eating away at me. It's definitely not "Girl Interrupted" lost or "Lindsay Lohan" lost. I've been just kind of floating around and going with the wind. While I always embrace a good "going with the wind" moment, I think that living ones life that way for a long period of time can be utterly draining.
After months of reflection, alone time, tears, good times, and clearly bad times, I have made a decision to take control of my life. Now! There are a few ways that I intend on doing this. I've realized the beauty of having a blog and being able to share this with y'all is that if you see me out in the streets, you are totally welcome to call me out if you catch me slipping on my goals (which I REALLY encourage BTW Lol). So like I was saying, I have really thought out how I am going to begin this little journey of mine. Here we go!
1. PRAY! Everyday... To myself... out loud... on my iPhone Notes... whatever works at the moment.
2. Start with the Master Cleanse. Naysayers, please keep comments to yourself... Lol... No seriously... No negativity needed here.
For those that do not know, the Master Cleanse, "also known as the Lemon Cleanse and the Maple Syrup Diet, is a body and mind detoxification program created by alternative medicine performer Stanley Burroughs in 1941." Don't you just LOVE Wikipedia! Some people chose to do the Cleanse for 7 or 10 days. I've chosen to go full out and do 10 days.
3. Along with the Cleanse, I'm giving drinking a little rest. I know! I know! No fun huh? Well, I'm actually not even allowed to drink while doing the Cleanse, but I figured it would be a great way to focus and gain some perspective. Don't worry DC Summer friends... I promise to have a little fun with you before the summer is over :)
4. Cloves... Also taking a hike with the Cleanse and it will be a great path to me quitting at the end of summer. I know some people are gunna be ecstatic about #4. Lol
5. Get back active! I think back to when I was happiest and sharpest and it was definitely anytime I was competing in some type of sports activity. I miss that... I miss competition... I miss being outdoors and going for a run or swim. It's been a minute so I may just start with taking Ollie on some journeys or borrowing someones bike until I get this money up and get my own. SMH...
6. Reflect. Read. Write.
7. Get a weave... Hahaha... I'm just playing... but on the low... If this DC heat keeps it up, I might actually keep #7
So there's my list. That is my own personal path to gaining some peace and taking back control of my life. When I prayed, I asked God for strength and dude! I am going to need A LOT of it to really follow through. I will honestly say that I tend to make goals and just say eff it and move onto the next. This is NOT the person that I want to be. This is also something very difficult to admit, but it's necessary if I'm going to get to where I need to in life.
Like I said, I'm going to need some strength. I'm going to need support. If you can, pray for a player... Offer some words of encouragement... @Reply me on Twitter and help me stay motivated.... and if there's something that you are skitting on, consider stopping and setting a dope lil' goal for yourself. I know... It's hard, but trust me when I say... I am the ultimate skitter and I'm pretty damn good at it, but skitting is whack as long as you're skitting yourself.
Thanks in advance Homies,
L. Paige
L. Paige
Tuesday, June 1, 2010
"It really was no miracle. What happened was just this..."
If you asked me last year what type of person I’d be a year from then, I’d be totally off. My outlook has changed, my circumstances, approach towards life, goals, have all changed- For the better. Most would just write it off as maturation, but I’m not gonna limit myself to that. Yes, I’ve matured. But I have also been blessed, I’ve blossomed, I’ve experienced, I’ve yearned for more and for better. That’s not just maturation. That’s something divine.
I know that everyone has something deep down inside that tells them they deserve better or that they were destined for something great. But I feel that 10x more than others, I think. LOL Not downplaying anyone else’s dreams or goals. Not at all. For one, I wish nothing but the best for EVERYONE. But simply because I no longer compare my life to anyone else’s. I can’t. It’s a disease that many of us face and it only holds us back. Never compare. Set your own personal goals, base them only off your wants/needs/reality, then attain them on your own schedule. Simple. I’m destined for some big shit… That’s all I know.
I won’t lie though. I’m all about the positive now but let me keep it real. Sometimes I get really down. It’s because I look around and see privileged people. Some people just have so fuckin easy and it pisses me off. I get sooooo mad and envious and shut down. But they are not privileged- They are simply blessed in different ways than I am. At times like these, my positive attitude goes out of the window. I try to whine to someone but I get no results. You know, like when you were younger you did that to your parents and they always had something to say or do to make you happy for the moment. So whining gets tired. Because I realized that no one can help me but me. That’s how it’s been for many years. And yes, I pray about it. I do. But I learned something in church a short while ago….
I learned that God is really our Father in more ways than we realize. Essentially, the sermon was about asking for things versus waiting your turn. Being patient enough to wait on God’s movement and the things that were already written for us. The example the pastor gave us was how just like when we were younger we’d beg, cry and have tantrums for the things we wanted, we have that same relationship with God- Our Father. Didn’t matter if my mama told me we didn’t have the money for it or if I already had a similar toy, if I wanted it- I wanted it now. Something in my head told me I needed it and it was imperative that I had it at that very moment, thus, on my time. So like most parents, even when they know you shouldn’t have it, they give it to you. Sometimes because they really want you to shut the hell up. But sometimes, they give it you in a, “Here! Take this shit. You’ll learn.” type of way. (Don’t you remember how stupid you felt when you proved your parents right with stuff like that? LOL)
So back to me. When I start to whine about things that aren’t going my way… I don’t pray about it. I feel like it’s wrong of me to pray for my wants. I already know that God has my best interest at heart and will provide the things that I need. No need for me to ask for those. I just give thanks all the time. Even for the hard times. Because I know that there is a lesson out of it. Simple.
But sometimes I just cry to myself. Because I want to just call my daddy and have him tell me SOMETHING! Anything! There is nothing like the firm solution from a father figure. It’s like the end all, be all. Even if you don’t like it, from that point you kind of feel comfortable just accepting whatever he said. I was really emotional after this sermon on Father’s. I would kill for that comfort.
I pray that my Dad would come to me in my dreams but he never does. All I really want is a hug. Just to hear his voice tell me that everything will be okay. I’d believe him. And even though a dream is just a figment of my imagination, I’d take that and run with it. It would provide so much comfort. Just like when you haven’t heard from someone in a long time and they call you. Or like, when you think that you will never hear from someone again and you finally see their name pop up on the screen of your phone. Yea, that feeling. I want that. I wonder why he never comes to my dreams.
I say all of this to say, sometimes we feel as though we are at our lowest points. I told you, if someone asked me where I thought I’d be at on June 1, 2010.. It wouldn’t be here. And not only location wise, but who I’ve become as a person. I wouldn’t have been able to describe this Victoria a year ago. And yes, there will be so many great times. But we need to be real with ourselves, there will be some bad times too- Let’s face it. What is most important and what will get you by is your resolve. With you accepting things for how they are, being thankful regardless of how much you like the cards you were dealt and being humbled by whatever lesson that experience was divinely placed in your life for. In life, there will be times were you cannot lean on anyone to whine. All you will have is you.
Be strong. Be thankful. Be you. When you are down, look up!
-Vic
I know that everyone has something deep down inside that tells them they deserve better or that they were destined for something great. But I feel that 10x more than others, I think. LOL Not downplaying anyone else’s dreams or goals. Not at all. For one, I wish nothing but the best for EVERYONE. But simply because I no longer compare my life to anyone else’s. I can’t. It’s a disease that many of us face and it only holds us back. Never compare. Set your own personal goals, base them only off your wants/needs/reality, then attain them on your own schedule. Simple. I’m destined for some big shit… That’s all I know.
I won’t lie though. I’m all about the positive now but let me keep it real. Sometimes I get really down. It’s because I look around and see privileged people. Some people just have so fuckin easy and it pisses me off. I get sooooo mad and envious and shut down. But they are not privileged- They are simply blessed in different ways than I am. At times like these, my positive attitude goes out of the window. I try to whine to someone but I get no results. You know, like when you were younger you did that to your parents and they always had something to say or do to make you happy for the moment. So whining gets tired. Because I realized that no one can help me but me. That’s how it’s been for many years. And yes, I pray about it. I do. But I learned something in church a short while ago….
I learned that God is really our Father in more ways than we realize. Essentially, the sermon was about asking for things versus waiting your turn. Being patient enough to wait on God’s movement and the things that were already written for us. The example the pastor gave us was how just like when we were younger we’d beg, cry and have tantrums for the things we wanted, we have that same relationship with God- Our Father. Didn’t matter if my mama told me we didn’t have the money for it or if I already had a similar toy, if I wanted it- I wanted it now. Something in my head told me I needed it and it was imperative that I had it at that very moment, thus, on my time. So like most parents, even when they know you shouldn’t have it, they give it to you. Sometimes because they really want you to shut the hell up. But sometimes, they give it you in a, “Here! Take this shit. You’ll learn.” type of way. (Don’t you remember how stupid you felt when you proved your parents right with stuff like that? LOL)
So back to me. When I start to whine about things that aren’t going my way… I don’t pray about it. I feel like it’s wrong of me to pray for my wants. I already know that God has my best interest at heart and will provide the things that I need. No need for me to ask for those. I just give thanks all the time. Even for the hard times. Because I know that there is a lesson out of it. Simple.
But sometimes I just cry to myself. Because I want to just call my daddy and have him tell me SOMETHING! Anything! There is nothing like the firm solution from a father figure. It’s like the end all, be all. Even if you don’t like it, from that point you kind of feel comfortable just accepting whatever he said. I was really emotional after this sermon on Father’s. I would kill for that comfort.
I pray that my Dad would come to me in my dreams but he never does. All I really want is a hug. Just to hear his voice tell me that everything will be okay. I’d believe him. And even though a dream is just a figment of my imagination, I’d take that and run with it. It would provide so much comfort. Just like when you haven’t heard from someone in a long time and they call you. Or like, when you think that you will never hear from someone again and you finally see their name pop up on the screen of your phone. Yea, that feeling. I want that. I wonder why he never comes to my dreams.
I say all of this to say, sometimes we feel as though we are at our lowest points. I told you, if someone asked me where I thought I’d be at on June 1, 2010.. It wouldn’t be here. And not only location wise, but who I’ve become as a person. I wouldn’t have been able to describe this Victoria a year ago. And yes, there will be so many great times. But we need to be real with ourselves, there will be some bad times too- Let’s face it. What is most important and what will get you by is your resolve. With you accepting things for how they are, being thankful regardless of how much you like the cards you were dealt and being humbled by whatever lesson that experience was divinely placed in your life for. In life, there will be times were you cannot lean on anyone to whine. All you will have is you.
Be strong. Be thankful. Be you. When you are down, look up!
-Vic
Friday, May 28, 2010
"Now which way do we go?"
What up homies? Okay... So let me introduce myself and all that good shit... Fill y'all in on who I am and why you should listen to me and read my stories at ALL times... Lol... JK... but no seriously...I'm Paige... A true Southern Girl... a Bohemian (i.e. my Twitter name, SouthernBohemia)... an artist... a party girl with a plan... and a Hopeless Romantic... I probably should have used more intellectual terms to describe myself so that you can take my posts seriously... Lol, but fuck it... You feel me. I really would like to give y'all the rundown about my life and stats, but I ramble and feel like that may end up being a bit much. Besides if you know me personally, then you already know my resume and if you don't... You'll figure that shit out through my future posts...
I feel very connected to this theme of "The Yellow Brick Road" because I think that's what life basically is all about... For example... We have these people ("Dorothy", "The Tin Man", "Scarecrow", "The Cowardly Lion", and "Toto's" lil' cute ass).... I totally feel the connection and journey that each person is going through.
Like Dorothy, I was just a girl immersed in this new world (HOWARD), that is filled with Wicked Witches (HATERS), Monkeys/Fields of hypnotizing Poppy Plants and Illusions (USELESS DISTRACTIONS), and IMPOSSIBLE forks in the road (Life-changing OBSTACLES) standing in my way to Emerald City (DREAMS).
So, like my man Scarecrow, I just want to get my learn on and become an educated Black woman in today's world that pushes the idea that a Black woman is most glorified if she's in some sort of Entertainment/Sexual limelight. Then there's The Cowardly Lion... Man! All of my life, I have been the sensitive, caring, and understanding person who dances around others and their feelings while totally compromising my own needs and wants. With that being said, I am learning how to be courageous and speak up for myself even if that means facing criticism or disapproval.
*SIDENOTE* I'm jamming to Coltrane right now... Isn't he so incredibly dope?
Now...Toto... That cute little pup... Well for those that know me... Know I have an adorable little puppy Oliver Jack (Yes... Jack as in Jack Daniels- My ultimate drink of choice) *Hey new friends! I told you I would fill you in about me along the way* ... But yea... Oliver is my puppy who I am sure was put on this earth to provide me with entertainment while constantly testing my patience... Posts of our adventures Coming Soon..
"The Tin Man"... First of all... I definitely referred to myself as the Tin Man for almost a year after getting played ridiculously by a boy who opened my heart ALL the way up then took that shit and did a tap dance on it that would put Savion Glover to shame. Honestly, I was the girl who was "IN LOVE with LOVE", got some experience under my belt, and realized this being weak shit is for the birds. Then with some thought and consideration, I decided I'm still open to truly love a good man with ALL of my heart and soul one day, but I may have to travel down THAT road by metro, bike, or even foot instead of a horse and carriage that I always thought would be waiting for me outside my door. NOW... while I am open to Love... I am not currently open for shenanigans, games, or taking the leap off the cliff FIRST unless a man is holding my hand ready to jump with me... (That was a tad dramatic... Lol)
All in all... I'm just a Simple girl from Georgia who wants to stay grounded, learn about life and what the world has to offer, not apologize for who I am, and find a dope dude who's down to take this journey with me and let Oliver ride Bitch in the backseat...
-L. Paige
Tuesday, May 18, 2010
We're Not In Kansas Anymore...
So as my official first post, let me introduce myself. Hi, I'm VMarie. I'm 23-years old, I live in Harlem, New York and I'm an aspiring ... Well, I aspire to be ... Okay, I'm working on being The Shit. So whatever professional term or title that may be, I'm fine with that. I'm a native Detrioiter and I'm IN LOVE with my family. I love to sing, I've been told that I was a man in my past lives, I do freelance fun and I volunteer as a Motivator on a daily basis. Why do I feel like I have something to say? You will see.
I graduated from Howard University c/o 2009. What began as a monumental year quickly switched on me. Stuff just kept happening in 2009. First thing: My oldest sister got into a really bad car accident while I was home for the New Year. It scared the hell out of me! I have this deep-rooted fear of cars, driving in general and collisions. My father was killed in a car accident and I was hit in a hit and run accident when I was 8. I also totaled my car Junior year when I fell asleep at the wheel. So yea.. It's a touchy area for me. Weeks later, President Obama had his Inaugural moment in Washington, DC and my fellow Bison and I all had front row seats. Then I got a call from my sister that our brother was shot and killed... I missed some of Inauguration because I was at my brother's funeral. (I am sure that I will touch on this subject in a future post, just not now.) Fast forward to graduation! I finish school and I have no job, and no concrete plans. I am freaking the fuck out!! I worked hard in college, why couldn't I find ANYTHING? I had New York in mind but with no job, no money and 15 days late on rent (eviction notice on the door), I wasn't going there anytime soon. This was one of the lowest points of my life. I couldn't figure out why things weren't happening as I wanted them to. My Linesister Virginia told me one day, "Victoria, I don't know why things aren't happening for you but for some divine reason it's not your time." She was right. So I went back to the drawing board and reassessed my life and priorities.
Now push forward to August! (I'm leaving out so many things but whatever!) I landed a job as an Executive Assistant at an IT firm. Just my MF-ing luck, my boss is sexually harassing me!! Sending me freaky texts on my Blackberry at like 6am and after work hours. I didn't say anything though. My family can't afford to get me an attorney! So I took it. I would cry at lunch everyday. And then guess what? They LAY ME OFF! WTF? What am I supposed to do now? I made an appointment with my hair stylist the next day and got a fly ass haircut! It was time to get the fuck outta DC!
I was planning on heading back to Detroit- My definition of "giving up." So I randomly go to a Job Fair at HU. I run into my Mentor. I hadn't spoken to her in a while but I still loved her. I met her when I interviewed with her one year prior at that same Job Fair during my Senior year.
One week later, I was in New York interviewing. A week after, I had a second interview. Two weeks after that... I was hung-over on the Megabus with two large bags and $250 in my account. I got the job and I was moving to New York.
I've lived in New York since November and boy has my life changed since college. I've learned so much about myself, some things about life and even more about having faith in God and my independence. Fact of the matter is... I don't know anybody else like me. I don't know many chicks at 23 that have seen the things I've seen, experienced the things I've experienced or have the resolve that I have. God has a funny way of showing you who the boss is. There are some things we pray for that we want, few that we need. Seldom are we patient enough to wait for the things that God has already written for us. New York was something that I felt was calling me. Apparently, it was already in store for me.
Moral of story: I'm no different from any other little girl from Detroit. 4 siblings, single mother household, came from the hood. And I don't pretend not to be. Yea, I was able to go to my dream school HU but my parents aren't doctors or lawyers with bread. I didn't get an allowance every month or my rent paid for. I was on Financial Aid like a mugggg!!! First one to go to college, leave Detroit, no kids, started a career (not a job), living life. I'm that same little girl who has dumb, stupid, crazy, big dreams and not afraid to go for them. You should be too.
I've been keeping track of my story and oh boy, I can't wait keep adding to this! Like Dorothy said, "We're not in [Detroit] anymore" hahaha Hell naw! I'm in my dream city... I'm following my YELLOW BRICK ROAD.
Where will it lead me next?
-Vic
I graduated from Howard University c/o 2009. What began as a monumental year quickly switched on me. Stuff just kept happening in 2009. First thing: My oldest sister got into a really bad car accident while I was home for the New Year. It scared the hell out of me! I have this deep-rooted fear of cars, driving in general and collisions. My father was killed in a car accident and I was hit in a hit and run accident when I was 8. I also totaled my car Junior year when I fell asleep at the wheel. So yea.. It's a touchy area for me. Weeks later, President Obama had his Inaugural moment in Washington, DC and my fellow Bison and I all had front row seats. Then I got a call from my sister that our brother was shot and killed... I missed some of Inauguration because I was at my brother's funeral. (I am sure that I will touch on this subject in a future post, just not now.) Fast forward to graduation! I finish school and I have no job, and no concrete plans. I am freaking the fuck out!! I worked hard in college, why couldn't I find ANYTHING? I had New York in mind but with no job, no money and 15 days late on rent (eviction notice on the door), I wasn't going there anytime soon. This was one of the lowest points of my life. I couldn't figure out why things weren't happening as I wanted them to. My Linesister Virginia told me one day, "Victoria, I don't know why things aren't happening for you but for some divine reason it's not your time." She was right. So I went back to the drawing board and reassessed my life and priorities.
Now push forward to August! (I'm leaving out so many things but whatever!) I landed a job as an Executive Assistant at an IT firm. Just my MF-ing luck, my boss is sexually harassing me!! Sending me freaky texts on my Blackberry at like 6am and after work hours. I didn't say anything though. My family can't afford to get me an attorney! So I took it. I would cry at lunch everyday. And then guess what? They LAY ME OFF! WTF? What am I supposed to do now? I made an appointment with my hair stylist the next day and got a fly ass haircut! It was time to get the fuck outta DC!
I was planning on heading back to Detroit- My definition of "giving up." So I randomly go to a Job Fair at HU. I run into my Mentor. I hadn't spoken to her in a while but I still loved her. I met her when I interviewed with her one year prior at that same Job Fair during my Senior year.
One week later, I was in New York interviewing. A week after, I had a second interview. Two weeks after that... I was hung-over on the Megabus with two large bags and $250 in my account. I got the job and I was moving to New York.
I've lived in New York since November and boy has my life changed since college. I've learned so much about myself, some things about life and even more about having faith in God and my independence. Fact of the matter is... I don't know anybody else like me. I don't know many chicks at 23 that have seen the things I've seen, experienced the things I've experienced or have the resolve that I have. God has a funny way of showing you who the boss is. There are some things we pray for that we want, few that we need. Seldom are we patient enough to wait for the things that God has already written for us. New York was something that I felt was calling me. Apparently, it was already in store for me.
Moral of story: I'm no different from any other little girl from Detroit. 4 siblings, single mother household, came from the hood. And I don't pretend not to be. Yea, I was able to go to my dream school HU but my parents aren't doctors or lawyers with bread. I didn't get an allowance every month or my rent paid for. I was on Financial Aid like a mugggg!!! First one to go to college, leave Detroit, no kids, started a career (not a job), living life. I'm that same little girl who has dumb, stupid, crazy, big dreams and not afraid to go for them. You should be too.
I've been keeping track of my story and oh boy, I can't wait keep adding to this! Like Dorothy said, "We're not in [Detroit] anymore" hahaha Hell naw! I'm in my dream city... I'm following my YELLOW BRICK ROAD.
Where will it lead me next?
-Vic
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